Humor: How did the chicken cross the road?

 I'm sorry this is an off-topic post, but I hope it makes you at  least grin ;-)  

 Steve Cosner

     It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet
     that nobody noticed.
 
  Win 95 Chicken:
     You see different colored feathers while it crosses, but cook
     it and it still tastes like ... chicken.
 
  Microsoft Chicken (TM):
     It's already on both sides of the road.  And it just bought the
     road.
 
  OOP Chicken:
     It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.
 
  Assembler Chicken:
     First it builds the road ...
 
  C Chicken:
     It crosses the road without looking both ways.
 
  C++ Chicken:
     The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you'd simply refer
     to him on the other side.
 
  VB Chicken:
     USHighways!TheRoad.cross (aChicken)
 
  Delphi Chicken:
     The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other
     side.
 
  Java Chicken:
     If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, the server will
     download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets)
 
  Web Chicken:
     Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.
 
   Gopher Chicken:
     Tried to run, but got flattened by the Web chicken.
 
  Newton Chicken:
     Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it
     across the road in your pocket !
 
  Cray Chicken:
     Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it
     in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side fully
     cooked.
 
  Quantum Logic Chicken:
     The chicken is distributed probabalistically on all sides of the
     road until you observe it on the side of your course.
 
  Lotus Chicken:
     Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do !
 
  Mac Chicken:
     No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the
     road, so there's no way to tell it to.
  
  Al Gore Chicken:
     Waiting for completion of NCI (National Chicken-crossing
     Infrastructure) and will cross as soon as it's finished, assuming
     he's re-elected and the Republicans don't gut the program.
 
  COBOL Chicken:
     0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
     IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES THEN
        PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
        VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
           ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
     ELSE
        GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING