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Oralce Humor

From: Joseph S. Testa <jtesta_at_scioto.net>
Date: 1997/10/10
Message-ID: <343EB28A.139AC88B@scioto.net>#1/1

Hopefully lighten up your oracle day!!!!

>> Some of the oracle real life messages
 

>> Q. What if your Dad loses his car keys ?
>> A. 'Parent keys not found !'
>>
>> Q. What if your old girl friend spots you with your new one ?
>> A. 'Duplicate value on index !'
>>
>> Q. What if the golf ball doesn't get into the hole at all ?
>> A. 'Value larger than specified precision !'
>>
>> Q. What if you try to freak out with somebody else's girlfriend and
 being kicked out ?
>> A. 'Insufficient privileges on the specified object !'
>>
>> Q. What if you don't get any response from the girl next door ?
>> A. 'No data found !' or ' Query caused no rows retrieved !'
>>
>> Q. What if you get response from the girl next door and her Mom too?
 

>> A. 'SELECT INTO returns too many rows !'
>>
>> Q. What if you dial a wrong number ?
>> A. 'Invalid number' or ' Object doesn't exist !'
>>
>> Q. What if you try to beat your own trumpet ?
>> A. 'Object is found mutating !'
>>
>> Q. What if you are too late to office and the boss catches you ?
>> A. 'Discrete transaction failed !'
>>
>> Q. What if you see 'theatre full' when you go to a movie ?
>> A. 'Maximum number of users exceeded !'
>>
>> Q. What if you don't get table in the lunch room ?
>> A. 'System out of tablespace !'

--
Joseph S. Testa, Oracle Database Administrator
Are you looking for Oracle DBA in Central Ohio, but only want one for
some part-time work? try http://web.scioto.net/jtesta
That is also the place to find the FREE, "how do I build a second,
third, etc, instance, without using oracle's installer, database
scripts.
ICQ UIN: 2814105(Joe-N8XCT, Home) UIN: 2832230(&oracle, work).
Received on Fri Oct 10 1997 - 00:00:00 CDT

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