Dear Technician,
Have you tried talking one on one, outside the office, with the one
person who is causing the problems?
Start with the "sandwich/oreo" approach:
begin with a statement that is flattering, something that they will
enjoy hearing ("I really thought your ideas on xyz were great")
This ensures that they are in a receptive mood to hear what you next
have to say
then continue with statements that address the problem. Each statement
should be "I" (I feel, I think, I don't understand) as opposed to "you"
(you do this, you don't do that). Do not use the word "but", that has
negative connotations. Try not to use the word "not" as well (turn
negative statements into positive ones)
statements can be along the lines of "I feel that sometimes we approach
problems from different angles and I think that we end up working at
cross-purposes. I would like to see us working together more smoothly.
What can I do to help make this happen?"
this engages them in the process of better communications.
end with another flattering statement. This ensures that they leave you
in a positive mood and don't immediately reject what you have to say.
Ann, filling in for Dear Oracle9i
- Paula_Stankus_at_doh.state.fl.us wrote:
> Dear Ann (hehe),
>
> Previous to this assignment I have been considered to be principled
> about
> technology but reasonable and pragmatic. At this assignment I was
> given a
> big send up and there were some real insecurities already in-place
> from
> people put into high-level IT jobs without any real IT experience. I
> was
> told to take a proactive role (at first) and I did but I feel that
> this has
> only caused more resentment - plus I am not the best e-mail writer in
> the
> universe and e-mail can lead to miscommunications. Now, I look back
> at the
> last 3 years and realize that unconsciously people hear me with a
> certain
> perspective - miss know-it-all, technical geek -B*. Outside of my
> job I am
> considered patient, team-playing, caretaker type. I realize that the
> one
> thing I need to do is use this opportunity to hone my personal skills
> and I
> am not a person to easily give-up (worked one place for 10 years,
> married
> high-school sweetheart, dedicated wife, mother, daughter of elderly
> parents). However, with a bad start and the last 3 years of dodging
> more
> personal missiles then I can think of (including being personally
> insulted
> in meetings with users - something I would never do to another) I
> don't know
> what to do. The IT market is pretty stiff and right now I have 2
> small
> children, a husband and elderly parents relying on me and my income.
> Sometimes I feel that what I am feeling could be somewhat due to the
> tightening market and insecure overall economy and the fact that this
> particular organization has not had a strong CIO for the last 7 years
> -
> leading to more emphasis on political positioning (wow - learning
> much more
> about politics then I ever wanted to know) and that I am not alone.
> This
> environment I have used to temper my standards and responses, got
> Oracle OCP
> after holding out for 8 years, heck considering to write a book on
> the IT
> government industry - kind of a parody in light of P.J. O'Rourke.
> Please
> understand that not everyone in this environment has these issues.
> In
> otherwords, I am not Schizophrenic feeling everyone is against me.
> However,
> this environment is not balanced and so the moderate, objective
> voices seem
> to get lost in the storm. So I am trying to find a way to turn this
> whole
> thing around - I believe there is one person especially who is at the
> heart
> of this. Others have reported this as so. I do not wish to cause
> this
> person any harm. I just want to turn this thing around without
> having to
> get another job. I would like to see a win-win. My dream is to work
> with
> other technical professionals to development products of lasting
> quality
> that really address business needs. I have something significant
> invested
> in the users here, the technology, the other technicians and
> management.
> Any ideas/advice?
>
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Received on Sun Apr 06 2003 - 15:13:36 CDT