Re: Table/Attribute Modeling

"Marshall" <marshall.spight_at_gmail.com> wrote in message news:1173487463.660889.107220_at_h3g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
> I was interviewing a guy today, and he had obviously
> been formally schooled in ERM. Every time I run in to
> that I feel vaguely left out. I don't have a methodology
> with a cool name that I use. How am I supposed to
> impress the babes and wow my boss without an
> important name for what I do? Waaah!
>
> Driving home, it hit me: I *do* have a methodology
> that I use for schema design; it just doesn't have
> a cool name. What I need is a cool name! So I
> tried to think of a name for the methodology I use
> for schema design; one that was important sounding,
> so it would impress people, and yet also descriptive
> of what it is I actually do. I then it came to me:
>
> "Table/Attribute Modeling."
>
> I do T/AM. What crappy methodology do you use?
> Oh, that's so 1990s. I pity you.
>
> You see, with Table/Attribute Modeling, I analyze
> application requirements to generate a set of
> necessary tables, and a set of attributes for each
> table. Then I'm able to convert these sets into
> actual executable SQL DDL, using a proprietary
> algorithm that I made up just now. You probably
> couldn't understand it. And voila! There's my schema.
>
> I do it this way because I'm so awesome.
>
>
> Marshall
>
> PS. In high school biology, we had an assignment
> once to come up with a mnemonic for the hierarchy
> "Kingdom Phylum Class Order Family Genus Species."
> A friend of mine did the assignment roughly as follows:
>
> "Whenever I have to recall the classification hierarchy,
> I am able to do so by remembering these simple words:
> Kingdom Phylum Class Order Family Genus Species."
>

OK, this must be satire.

But what are you satirizing?

I'd like to discuss ERM seriously, but I don't want to spoil the fun. Received on Sat Mar 10 2007 - 15:23:59 CET