Re: OMLETv4 The Ultimate Instance Monitor

From: <omlet_at_omlet.org>
Date: 30 Jun 2004 08:06:26 -0700
Message-ID: <dc6c1ff0.0406300706.2841201b_at_posting.google.com>


fitzjarrell_at_cox.net (David Fitzjarrell) wrote in message news:<9711ade0.0406281116.5ed25aff_at_posting.google.com>...
> omlet_at_omlet.org wrote in message news:<dc6c1ff0.0406261017.57dedeba_at_posting.google.com>...
> > Dear DBA,
> > > >
> > > > You are cordially invited to test and review our windows native and
> > > > 100% pure Java Oracle 9i/8i Monitoring Application (OMLET). OMLET is
> > > > the Ultimate Visual Real Time Oracle Monitoring Tool. As the
> > > > leading expert in your field, your opinion is highly valued and your
> > > > feedback is very appreciated. We would like to encourage you to distribute
> > > > copies of OMLET to your associates and fellow DBAs. Omlet can be
> > > > downloaded from:
> > > >
> > > > http://www.geocities.com/teraknowledgesystems/download.html
> > > >
> > > > or any of many mirrors worldwide:
> > > >
> > > > http://www.iboogie.com/search?q=omlet+oracle
> > > >
> > > > Thank you for your time and participation.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Cheers,
> > > >
> > > > The OMLET Team
> > > > Tera Knowledge Systems, Inc.
> > >
> > > I clicked on this link to say thank you for posting to the correct group
> >
> > Thank you Daniel;
> >
> > To show my appreciation here is a poem written just for you; by Simon
> > from rec.humor: Copyright is assured for its rightful owner!
> >
> > The Omlet of Daniel Morgan
> > ===========================
> >
> >
> > This is the tale of Daniel Morgan,
> > Who had a tiny oracle performance and clit-ormance,
> > It gave s)his significant others/dbas such a shock,
> > When they touched he?i[r/s] tiny instance,
> > S)He laboured hard to find a cure,
> > S)He polished it with fish manure,
> > S)He tied it up with bits of string,
> > But still it was a poor small thing,
> > It was just one transaction when fully reared,
> > When shutting down normal/abort it disappeared,
> > It was just by chance they called s)him Danny the Wanny,
> > Half an parse shorter it would have been Fanny the Lanny,
> > One day Danny the Zanny read in the Daily Mail,
> > That things called hard falses were on sale,
> > For women who had tiny breasts,
> > They wore these things inside their vests,
> > And then went in the latest fashions,
> > To satisfy mens beastly passions,
> > Our Danny said, "I am no fool,
> > Why can't I have a big false manure pool."
> > He worked all night to make a big false chopper,
> > And ended up with a great big whopper,
> > It was 12 java long and made of pl/sql,
> > And any dba could stretch fanny like elastic buckets,
> > It really was a lovely job,
> > And on the end was a big red knob,
> > Dan tied it up with bits of twine,
> > It did look rather fine,
> > Lying there beneath his wants/jants/mants,
> > It just looked like an elephants,
> > The bees all flocked around with glee,
> > As they saw his nulge stretch to his wee wee,
> > No other fellas/gellas stood a chance,
> > When our Dan attended a dance,
> > For when the wallas danced with Danny,
> > kept tickling around their fanny,
> > began to faint and swoom,
> > As Danny waltzed them around the room,
> > What a shock they had in stall,
> > For one night dancing around the floor,
> > Danny stopped and loudly cursed,
> > S)He felt the string and strapping burst,
> > Before s)he reached the nearest seat,
> > Her/His zxool was hanging at his feet,
> > Her/His sick sig gave a strangled cough,
> > And said, "Excuse me but your moose fell off!"
> > I could n't describe the scenes there after,
> > The wise cracks and scournful laughter,
> > All those mules that Dan had dated,
> > Gazed as so deflated,
> > Silvia made s)him sick,
> > She gave a spiteful kick,
> > Poor Danny's screams rang round the hall,
> > For the string was tied around s)his ball,
> > As s)he staggered to the nearest door,
> > dragged along the floor,
> > Course the band was almost crackers,
> > Whilst in the gents Dan bathed his knackers,
> > So if you are like Daniel Morgan,
> > And as tiny,
> > Remember though its only wee,
> > It's just as good for the pee !!!
>
> > omlet_at_omlet.org wrote:
> > >Daniel Morgan <damorgan_at_x.washington.edu> wrote in message
> news:<1088208286.33103_at_yasure>...
> > > omlet_at_omlet.org wrote:
> > > > omlet v4) wrote in message Dear DBA,
> > > >
> > > > You are cordially invited to test and review our windows native and
> > > > 100% pure Java Oracle 9i/8i Monitoring Application (OMLET). OMLET is
> > > > the Ultimate Visual Real Time Oracle Monitoring Tool. As the
> > > > leading expert in your field, your opinion is highly valued and your
> > > > feedback is very appreciated. We would like to encourage you to distribute
> > > > copies of OMLET to your associates and fellow DBAs. Omlet can be
> > > > downloaded from:
> > > >
> > > > http://www.geocities.com/teraknowledgesystems/download.html
> > > >
> > > > or any of many mirrors worldwide:
> > > >
> > > > http://www.iboogie.com/search?q=omlet+oracle
> > > >
> > > > Thank you for your time and participation.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Cheers,
> > > >
> > > > Amjad Daoud, OCP
> > > > The OMLET Team Lead
> > > > Tera Knowledge Systems, Inc.
> > >
>
>
> > > Danny the fanny,
>
> Interesting ... I've never seen anyone on this newsgroup with that
> particular name ...
>
> > > Dude you are a fucking moron. You've got the IQ of a cooked omlet.
> > > Half the crap you write doesn't make sense. You are the dim of the
> dimwits!
>
> I'm so sorry, but your self-evaluation has no place in this newsgroup.
> I'd reserve it for your employer, since he or she should be quite
> concerned with your behaviour. Besides, as a self-evaluation it is
> the most honest piece of work you've authored and submitted to the
> newsgroup.
>
>
> > > Aren't we lucky. What would we do without your students and your
> > > expertise? I bet half of them downloaded OMLET so far!
>
> I would doubt that, seriously. Unless, of course they are using it as
> an example of arrogance run amok.
>
> > > Your shameless plug YOU put at the bottom of EVERY ONE OF YOUR STUPID
> > > FUCKING POSTS; you and others make you dumb hippocrates.
>
> I've never known in intelligent crate, regardless of the construction.
>
> > > Shut the fuck up about it and move on, you're not going to win with
> > > your broken logic and arrogant self-serving attitude, god what a
> > > fucking dumbass. Get over it.
>
> Now, now, it's you who's arrogant, not Daniel. And it's your logic
> proven faulty time and again in your misguided posts to this
> newsgroup. I believe it's time for you to get over it. Amjad, since
> you appear to be the only one without a clue in this exchange.
>
> > > Apardon my languages DOC! You really deserve a Tonka Truck too like
> > > David J*. Or may be better you can help David with your girly kicks!
>
> This only proves once again you have no idea whom you're talking about
> in reference to me or my career. You have obviously confused me with
> someone else.
>
> David Fitzjarrell

I am really sorry; but the OMLET group is PG13. You need an ID and you must be older than 13 years. Your profile states you use Tonka trucks and your are a female. So we cannot admit you.

Sorry again. Received on Wed Jun 30 2004 - 17:06:26 CEST

Original text of this message