Re: Death of the DBA
Date: Fri, 21 Aug 2009 17:19:24 -0700 (PDT)
Message-ID: <3e6f5291-1390-4e91-9dda-1f53dfe633a1_at_o9g2000prg.googlegroups.com>
On Aug 20, 10:28 am, Mladen Gogala <mla..._at_bogus.email.invalid> wrote:
> On Thu, 20 Aug 2009 07:07:57 -0700, Helma wrote:
> > Perhaps you don't see any threat to the Oracle DBA.
>
> I don't.
>
>
>
> > Others who disagree might talk about the steady march of the MSsql
> > database,
>
> They also might check into Betty Ford clinic for a detox. MS SQL is
> is linked to a single platform and it remains tied to that platform.
> Windows is on desks, not in the server rooms. Databases are usually in
> the server rooms, except if we are talking about databases servicing
> fantasy football.
But, the platform is virtual. At least that's what they tell me those guys are doing.
>
> > the increasing database work going to India,
>
> The problem with the databases is that they usually contain vital company
> data. Most of the serious companies would think twice before moving the
> critical data overseas. I know of no bank or health insurance company that
> would allow its crucial business database(s) to be dislocated. What goes
> to India is development, not DBA work.
What about this cloud thingy?
>
> > the selfmanaging databases etc.
>
> > I
>
> Self-managing databases? Like those who obey Asimov's 3 laws? Here is how
> the 3 laws would look for databases:
>
> A database may not injure a human being, or through inaction, allow a
> human being to come to harm unless the being starts asking silly
> questions about the purpose and the fate of the DBA. The database should
> occassionally annoy human beings, just to remind them of its importance.
>
> A database must obey the orders given to it by the DBA. In case of doubt,
> re-read the previous sentence.
>
> A database must protect its own existence as long as such protection does
> not conflict with the First or the Second Law.
>
> What are "self-managing databases"? Do they exist in the "paperless
> office"? Dave, you're killing me.
Self-managing databases were explicated in set theory long ago:
[Curly is taking the oath]
Court Clerk: Take off your hat.
[Curly takes off his hat with his right hand] Court Clerk: Raise your right hand.
[With his right hand, Curly puts his hat back on, and raises the hand]
Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Put your left hand here.
Judge: [to Curly] Take off you hat.
[Curly does so with his right hand]
Court Clerk: [to Curly] Raise your right hand. [Curly puts his hat back on to raise the hand] Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Now, put your left hand here.
Judge: [to Curly] Please, take off your hat. [Curly does so with his right hand]
Court Clerk: [to Curly] Raise your right hand. [Curly repeats the process]
Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Now, put your left hand here.
Judge: [to Curly] Will you please take off your hat? [Curly does so with his right hand]
Court Clerk: [angrily, to Curly] Raise your RIGHT HAND. [Curly repeats the process]
Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Now, put your left hand here.
Judge: [to Curly] Take off your hat.
[Curly takes off the hat and places it on his cane, which is in his right hand]
Court Clerk: [to Curly] Raise your right hand. [Curly raises his cane with the hat on it] Court Clerk: [taking the hat off the cane] Get rid of that hat. [Curly takes the hat and puts it on the court clerk's head] Curly: [with both hands on the book] Raise YOUR right hand. [the court clerk does so, startles, takes the hat off, and places it under the book]
Court Clerk: Raise your right hand.
[Curly does so]
>
> --http://mgogala.freehos.com
Of course, with 3 laws, you need to come up with a zeroth law:
A database must not give Larry less money, or through inaction, allow money to be taken away from Larry.
jg
-- _at_home.com is bogus. http://www3.signonsandiego.com/stories/2009/aug/21/mak-1-enterprises-ran-scam-regulators-say/?uniontribReceived on Fri Aug 21 2009 - 19:19:24 CDT