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Re: Any1 seen the latest on Larry?

From: Joel Garry <>
Date: 15 Jan 2004 11:02:13 -0800
Message-ID: <>

Brian Peasland <> wrote in message news:<>...

> select max(bliss) from married_life;
> -----------------

(With apologies to Dear Abby,) How To Tell If Your Rich Geek Husband
Is Having An Affair:

(1) A sudden change in manner of dress and grooming, particularly
wearing shorts and deck shoes.

(2) Secretiveness, unwillingness to discuss pending mergers and

(3) Unexplained absences with lame excuses such as "Steve Jobs and I
got lost in the new garden mandala maze."

(4) Unfamiliar names on SEC corporate disclosure documents.

(5) Ping-floods on your home entertainment head/intranet.

(6) More jet fighter trips than usual.

(7) Stops confiding in cdo* under his fake handle.

(8) Buys a class-A domain and doesn't tell you.

(9) Mutual friends stop asking you for money.

(10) Refuses to let your limo driver take him to the airport when he's
buying Malaysia.

(11) Carries condoms even though he cancelled meetings in Bangcock.

(12) Purges Webcache.

(13) Leaves the house in the morning smelling like Egoiste and returns
in the evening smelling like Mukhalat al Maliki.

(14) Screams something about "DIANA" during night terrors.

(15) Raises hypothetical questions such as, "Do you think it's
possible to consistently read more than one database at a time?"

(16) Buys himself new electric underwear before the Barbados meeting.

(17) Insists that all his toys are kept out of your cars.

(18) Stops wearing his computer.

(19) Supposedly works a lot of overtime, but still doesn't get any
more pork barrel laws passed.

(20) Suddenly wants to try new programming techniques.

(21) Has unexplained surgery for repetitive motion injuries.

(22) Has a sudden desire to see his urologist.

(23) Picks fights in order to stamp out competition.

(24) Shows a sudden interest in a different type of operating system.

(25) Has a sudden preoccupation with his former management team.

(26) Spends an excessive amount of time on the computer, especially
after you have gone to bed, before you wake up in the morning, and all day.

(27) Works long hours on weekends, but is never at his desk to answer
the phone. Then calls back later with a reason, such as, "I was working in the computer room where there is more grid bandwidth."

(28) Has lots of "emergency acquisition strategy meetings." Then comes
home grumbling about the Sherman Antitrust act.

(29) And the telltale sign of a cheating rich geek? Scott McNealy
does or doesn't make fun of him!


-- is bogus.
Received on Thu Jan 15 2004 - 13:02:13 CST

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