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Home -> Community -> Usenet -> c.d.o.server -> OT: Re: I would like to know how experts look at this problem

OT: Re: I would like to know how experts look at this problem

From: Richard Foote <richard.foote_at_bigpond.com>
Date: Fri, 7 Mar 2003 22:37:53 +1000
Message-ID: <xc%9a.61957$jM5.158964@newsfeeds.bigpond.com>


"Pete Sharman" <peter.sharman_at_oracle.com> wrote in message news:b47ua401agr_at_drn.newsguy.com...
> In article <gnG9a.61395$jM5.157297_at_newsfeeds.bigpond.com>, "Richard
says...
> >
> >"Pete Sharman" <peter.sharman_at_oracle.com> wrote in message
> snip
> >> >
> >>
> >> Nah, go with the lot every time! :)
> >>
> >> As a matter of fact, if I don't see anything I can respond to in one
> >screen, I
> >> skip it without looking any further. It just takes too much time
> >otherwise. Of
> >> course, there is the "Foote Exception", where I have to look at
everything
> >from
> >> Richard to see where he's insulted me again. ;)
> >>
> >
> >Hi Pete,
> >
> >Me insult you, oh I'm hurt you suggest I would do such a thing.
> >
> >You know that I have nothing but the deepest feelings towards you despite
> >your unfortunate physical characteristics.
> >
> >Love and cuddles ;)
> >
> >Richard
> >
>
> Deepest feelings of hatred, disdain ... ?
>
> And just because I'm bigger than you ... Remember I'll be back in
Canberra late
> July so I can follow up our usual exchange of insults with physical abuse!
;)
>

Hi Pete,

I already knew of your impending return to sunny Canberra. The Canberra Times recently printed the following article:

"City Warned - Pete Sharman Returning Soon !!

We can confirm our earlier report that indeed Pete Sharman is expected to return to Canberra, Australia sometime in July. After many years in exile, this alarming news has been received by the local community with a mixture of both shock and dismay. The Prime Minister, John Howard was informed of this turn of events during his discussions with George W. Bush and has been quoted as saying he is "extremely concerned" and "will be monitoring the situation closely".

The City of Canberra, already suffering from the current drought and recent bushfires is a city in mourning. Mr B. Brown's reaction from Kambah is typical of many - "I can't believe he's coming back. I thought we saw the last of the bugger." Mrs. M Murphy from Calwell said "Hasn't the city suffered enough. This is all just so disappointing".

Mr R. Foote, President of the Society of Concern of Pete Sharman Activities was very angry at both the Federal and Local Governments upon hearing the news. "This situation is ridiculous" he said. "We have been lobbying the Government for ages for legislation to prevent this from ever happening. They have been complacent and negligent in not putting forth appropriate laws and now it's too late. The bugger is coming back and it's too late now to do anything about it".

Mrs B. Bettiwinkle, the darling 83 year old great gran mother at the centre of the "Fluffy Incident" was too frightened to leave her home when contacted by The Canberra Times. "I'm only just getting over what happened to my poor Fluffy and now this naughty, naughty man is coming back. I'm old you know and now the nightmares are all returning as if it was just yesterday. It's just not fair".

Fears of a serve recession in Canberra over all this are quite real say senior financial analysts. Mr H. Dough from Bull Market Associates was quite pessimistic. "We predict between a 20-30% downturn in the price of housing within a 20km radius of Pete Sharman's residence. Many people will be just too uncomfortable living so close to this man and already we've noticed a marked increase in people migrating from Canberra to places such as Freezengrad in Siberia, Stinkinghotenstan in northern Pakistan and even parts of south Dubbo".

The local police, although most concerned over the situation say everything should be under control and warn residents to take simple precautions. Sgt Y. Nicked says "We believe we have everything covered and with the recent decision to cancel leave, should have enough dedicated police officers to protect the local community. We strongly suggest all persons follow these key steps. 1) Ensure all cute, furry animals are safely kept in doors when not being supervised. 2) Ensure that any sexy, female undergarments (especially if pink or hot red in colour) are not left on washing lines for any longer than necessary. 3) If you happen to meet Pete in public, simply spin around and walk away as quickly as possible".

Read the Sunday Times tomorrow where we'll feature all the latest news as this terrible story unfolds".

Cool eh, you're famous !!

Cheers ;)

Richard Received on Fri Mar 07 2003 - 06:37:53 CST

Original text of this message

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