Oracle FAQ Your Portal to the Oracle Knowledge Grid

Home -> Community -> Mailing Lists -> Oracle-L -> Re: RE: UNCUT ORACLE-L The Motion Picture

Re: RE: UNCUT ORACLE-L The Motion Picture

From: <>
Date: Wed, 15 Aug 2001 07:13:53 -0700
Message-ID: <>

She was from the Tammy Fae school of makeup application. Big hair too.                                                                                             

                    Wolfe"               To:     Multiple recipients of list ORACLE-L  
                    <        <>                        
          >            cc:                                           
                    Sent by:             Subject:     Re: RE: UNCUT ORACLE-L The 
                    root_at_fatcity.        Picture                                       
                    06:51 PM                                                           
                    respond to                                                         

Don't you mean "rogue" college intern?    :) ----- Original Message -----
To: Multiple recipients of list ORACLE-L Sent: Tuesday, August 14, 2001 10:47 AM


Coming to theaters near you.   Oracle-L, the UNCUT version is rated NC-17.

Directed by Bruce.
Produced by Jared Still.


Lisa Koivu.  Watch as she machetes a user who left his userid and password on a post-it on his PC allowing a rouge college intern to hack the system and destroy data.


Lisa: "YOU'VE USED THAT PASSWORD FOR THE LAST TIME MISTER!!!!",  User: "NOooooooooooooo!"  Hack hack slice slice  Lisa: "Now where's that intern..."


Ross Mohan as her feisty sidekick. (envision Joe Pesci)

"Nice Cutting Lisa.  So l-user, is it funny now?  Does she make you laugh? Like a clown?  Looks like we'll have to rewrite that song.  'The ankle bone's connected to the spinal cord...'"


Rachel Carmichel, as the goddess of manager destruction. Watch as she stuffs a chair down the throat of a manager for his really stupid ideas.


Manager:  "But Rachel, don't you think that we could eliminate that 450g worth of data and save a lot of money in training, dba costs and license fees if we converted everything to Excel Spreadsheets?  Why are you looking at me like that?  No, now put down that chair that could be an OHSA recordable.  Open Wide?  Oh, you silly.  I've already had brunch with the steering committee.  That's where this excellent excel idea came from. We can do this right?  I figure 450 g isn't that much is it?  All we have to do is get some PC's and a couple secretaries and...  No, back away. Noooooooo."  Stuff, cram, cram.


Eric Pierce as Master Po giver of infinite knowledge.

"Grasshopper.  You will find all you need at these links."

Director Jared Still, in a special appearance.  He dispatches another developer for bad locking practices:

"Six table locks?  For a three table select?  I asked for code and you bring me this.  What have I done to deserve this disrespect.    To the acid baths with him..."


Christopher Bowes as the thoroughly confused rookie:

"HELP!...  Am I an idiot?  Well, no I don't think so. What's an idiot? RTFM? What's an RTFM?  Read the what?  What's a concepts manual.  What's a concept?  That's nice, but what is a database?  I've got to build one for my boss today.  I told him I would and my performance review is at 3pm...  Is 15 minutes enough time to build a 40 terabyte base?  But I thought DBA's did nothing but get in the way of us developers...  What's a tablespace?  What's a table"


Other special appearances by Steve Adams, Christopher Spence, Joe Testa and lots of others from the Oracle-L.  See them all as you've never seen them before.

See Oracle-L, the UNCUT version.  Coming this fall.

Sorry, folks, slow day...

Please see the official ORACLE-L FAQ:

Fat City Network Services    -- (858) 538-5051  FAX: (858) 538-5051
San Diego, California        -- Public Internet access / Mailing Lists
To REMOVE yourself from this mailing list, send an E-Mail message
to: (note EXACT spelling of 'ListGuru') and in
the message BODY, include a line containing: UNSUB ORACLE-L
(or the name of mailing list you want to be removed from).  You may
also send the HELP command for other information (like subscribing).
Received on Wed Aug 15 2001 - 09:13:53 CDT

Original text of this message